Do you sometimes feel like you are responsible for all of your partner’s behavior in your relationship? Does your spouse make you feel like everything he does is because you made him do it? Relationships like this are where a person is told “Well, if you wouldn’t act so stupid, then I wouldn’t have to point that out to you.” and many other things that make them feel responsible for the anger their spouse shows towards them. This is considered emotional abuse and unlike physical abuse, this kind of abuse goes unnoticed by everyone. Some experts even consider emotional abuse more dangerous and longer lasting that physical abuse. Here are the signs that you might be emotionally abused in your relationship.
Do you feel diminished in private all the time by all of your spouse’s criticism? Do you notice how charming and accommodating your spouse is in public but not to you? This is especially true around all of your friends and family members. So, when you go to a friend or a family member they think you are imagining it or just trying to start some sort of conflict that is unwarranted.
Do you feel humiliated by all of your spouse’s public revelations of all of your private matters or gives out all of your shortcomings in public? Do you also feel like you are always the one that is the brunt of all the jokes?
Does your spouse also go around withholding their affection, approval and their attention? This is a message that they are trying to tell you that you simply are not worthy and this treatment will erode away all of your self esteem in the end.
Your spouse will always threaten to leave you if you don’t try to do better and then you will become increasingly more anxious about what it is that you might do unwittingly that is going to drive them away if you don’t do whatever it is that you need to do to make things better.
Do you notice that all of your personal concerns and complaints are just simply dismissed as if they were not important at all? One common thing said might be “Can’t you take a joke?” or “Why do you such a big deal out of everything?” This is trying to make you feel that everything you are concerned about is not important.
Do you feel like you are always walking on eggshells because you are afraid that anything you say or do is going to upset your spouse? This is going to make you continually focus constantly on their needs and completely ignore your own needs.
All of this can and does lead to you having panic attacks, anxiety attacks, you probably feel depressed and are also suffering from ongoing health issues as well. All of this is considered emotional abuse and it’s your relationship that is making you sick emotionally and physically.
Final Note: If you can relate to any of the abuse listed above you are more than likely being emotionally abused and you need to seek help. You should also consider reaching out and find some counseling and a support group. You can even join one online if you can’t find one right away in your area.